On Listening...
When I ask you to listen to me and you start by giving me advice, you have not done what I have asked.
When I ask you to listen to me and you begin by telling me why I shouldn't feel that way, you are trampling on my feelings.
When I ask you to listen to me and you feel you have to solve my problems, you have failed me, strange as it may seem.
Listen!
All I ask is that you listen, not talk or do ….. just hear me. When you do something for me that I can do for myself, you contribute to my fear and inadequacy. And I can do for myself. I’m not helpless. Maybe discouraged and faltering, but not helpless. But, when you accept as simple fact that I do feel what I feel, no matter how irrational, then I can quit trying to convince you and get about the business of understanding what’s behind this irrational feeling. And when that’s clear the answers are obvious – and I don’t need advise. Irrational feelings make sense when we understand what is behind them.
Perhaps that’s why prayer works, sometimes, for some people ….. because God is mute, and doesn’t give advise or try to fix things.
God just listens and lets you work it out for yourself. So, please listen and just hear me. And if you want to talk wait a minute for your turn and I will gladly listen to you.
In your relationship learning to really listen to your partner, takes courage for when you listen you run the risk of having your world view, your perspective changed. Theses kinds of changes could help you to
Louisville KY 40213 Pastor Timothy Findley Jr. "Holy Spirit Led, Not Tradition Bound"
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